#120 Killing Me Softly...

My post #79 of this blog had the same title...
The context was different!
These days are killing me softly. Slowly and gradually with love. Its suddenly that I have nothing to do, and no target to achieve! Is It?

I download a movie but cant watch it cos I just dont feel like. I keep waiting for replies from people I dont know... I keep eating bread and eggs and keep drinking tea... I keep cycling, I keep going to the toilet every hour, I change my clothes 5 times a day... I have everything in the world but I am a begger in my own heart... I have everyone around me, but suddenly the vacuum of solitude encapsulates me like a black hole...

There are so many things I have to do, so many places I have to go, so many relations I have to keep, so many projects I have to complete, so many hours I have to sleep [?], so much to eat and so much to do.... whew! I have ideas in my mind, but most of the times I cant implement them.

Was I able to implement all these ideas, I would have been the Father of Modern India, I would have transformed it like no one ever did. I would have changed so many things around me. I would have made the world a better place.

But I dont. Cos all I do is hang out of the train like this and let the train take me where it is going. I am just a passenger... passenger of my own lazy skeleton!